Over the last few weeks things have been kinda difficult... most of my friends have been away, ill or moving... and with the added family illnesses stuff, life hasn't been all that easy...
loneliness has ruled...
anger came to stay...
and
questions set in...
i am doing better now... it took having my head melted down and re-set with a few sharp words about my work that allowed me to recognise just how deep the hole i had dug had gotten again...
i fear it every time... the darkness of the pit that sometimes we just do not realise we sit in until someone shines a light and makes us look at the walls we think are closing in on us
this isnt a pity party... my blog isnt meant to be, but i want to write about the reality of life. being a Christian isnt a free pass to the end... life is hard- plain and simple
without valleys we cant see the mountains... and all that...
in a resent meeting i had to read about how the church should be the foreground of setting the bar for honesty- that we should be a place where people feel that they can be honest, be truly themselves...
this also calls for us to be honest about where we are with God... to find space to explore our doubts, the book we read expressed how faith needs to have doubts, places where God can reach in and use these points to deep our relationship with him.
while my faith takes a battering- but i can never let go and not believe...
the reason i started this blog was because i wanted to say something on the title 'life is a journey... walk with me for a while'... i wanted to say that that journey continues regardless of who is or is not with me/i/us on the path... and while my path sometimes is alone i can still walk along it.
x
LISTENING TO- Cemeteries Of London By coldplay
PRAYING FOR- a friend's dad
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