In shock...

Well well...
this is a turn up for the books... holly and i have started our work on this terms essays!!!
yes is that a WOW i hear?! I know something special eh?!
no really its great to crack on with it all, i have SOOOO much work to do it s crazy... thus the making of a new blog http//djtink-at-youtube.blogspot.com and putting this blog online...
i am really enjoying the work this year... God does work mircles! but it is SOO much but i will keep plodding on like i do!!
starting to get annoyed at the office now... not excitiing for me... maybe i need a vending machine?!

x
LISTENING TO- MUSE apocalypse please
TRYING TO- write something intelligent

last night i was annoyed

So i got a little annoyed last night, wrote a long blog and then the site crashed and it was lost into the nothingness of laptop land...

after i have just tried to re-write what i think i wanted to say i have decided to delete it... no it is no more!

(just realised just how many 'e's are in the word delete has!)

So what is my thought for this evening?

I have some thoughts on youtube... but i want to think some more before i unleash them!

ok... does the desire to be loved make the world go round?

love is about trust, acceptance, doing anything for the other person... without these things why are we here?

We are made to be relational beings... made to love... but can we really understand what that means and what the effects are?

Sacrifice is the ultimate action of love, and yet most of your earthly thinking is on bargaining.. what is it worth... if i do this what do i get or what happens to me if... conditional love is a dangerous thing to have and yet its a human (sinful human) thing to have, the game we play.

Like it or not, many people believe Jesus did the sacrifice which beats all others hands down... he died so we might live, i know this... i know it in my head and i know in my heart, but only at a glimpse do i know it in my heart... i still wonder why Jesus died for me, i feel worthless, not worth bargaining for let alone loving Unconditionally... yet he did... he made me in the first place!

There will be one day where i will be able to understand more, i will be restored into the human being we were meant to be at the start, the human without sin... perfect and without fault... i cant wait for that day to come... the end of depression, i can hardly believe could happen... but it will!!!!!!

x

LISTENING TO- Kasabian- Shoot the runner

ok so im not sure if this is a good thing...

so i have joined youtube...........
is this a good thing?!

hmmmm

we will see!!

x

LISTENING TO- MUSE take a bow

Ok so i didnt meantion it the other day but i went to see delirious? on thursday evening in newport... and it was a great gig, i love my music me! While i dont have much musical taste when it comes to Christian music... i cant seem to find a band or person i really love, deliriou? dont do too badly on the scale...

they really seemed to enjoy performing which is a presure in itself to watch... but the element which is missing in all the other live gigs i go to is the worship part, the fact that all the singing and clapping, whopping and dancing is for God. While i strut my funky stuff for God on a daily basis, it was great to be in a place were everyone was doing to same...

Church is meant to have the element to it isnt it? all coming together to praise to our creator? i want and desire to have the all embraceing feeling i get at a gig at church... but then am i wanting it for selfish reasons... 'i' want the hype 'i' want to feel excited...

Can the 'boring' church life at times remind us how God is in the everyday and not just at the high points and low?

dont we need it all?
and what about the people who donthave it at all?

how i want to share this passion... and i am!!

x

LISTENING TO- dont give up... Basement Jaxx

why did this make me cry?!

i cry a lot... im a girl and its my right i guess, i seem to have little control over it lately!

but i can only see the beauty in this video, Christ's love is IN the action not the words...

beautiful... it truely is

x

LISTENING TO- the video track

(thanks to piet and richard passmore for their blogs)

So here is my new start... out with the old and in with the kind of new... my myspace will be closed from next weekend and so i have decided to make a go of this blogging lark...

It might be that i waffle about nothing, or i do in fact make some great discovery, either way nothing no really lose apart from the time it takes for me to think and type. But its a start of something i might continue!

i have decided i will put more pictures with my blogs, either to show my mood or something i have seen of late... also i get to show off my loving camera then!

i am a lil unsure just how truthful i should be here, in my blogs i mean, do i tell all or to i doctor it? It might become a depressing rant, which i wouldnt wish on anyone, but then if im not being honest, expressing how i feel what is my aim?!

So with that my first proper blog of the state of mind grows... what IS the aim of my blogging?

I want to invite anyone and everyone to stop and think...
I think its part of my calling by God to provide spaces for people to think about their faith and spirituality, to find a real sense of what they mean, think, do and how they see things and what that means to them and the people around them...

We all influence the people we are around... this is just another way of do that right?

So i hope my rabble on here will provide space for people to think... what would i do if that was me? why would i do that?

maybe this will become a diary...

who knows lol

x

LISTENING TO- relight my fire by take that

Why is blogging important?

So anyone who has wondered over my pages over the past few months we realise i havent been blogging of late...
and i have to ask why i still have a site...
why do i will i should have one? is there a need? is it just a good practice to have? talking to anyone who is willing to read and maybe comment... or is it having the accountability to write your thoughts and hope you can establish something meaningful sometimes...

Why do we blog and what did we have before this?

penpals? are blogs impersonal letters with less responsiblity?

I dont have the answers... i dont know if we can every get them... i dont know if i reallly care... but i still have a small resonsilbily to keep this open, to keep writing... to keep waiting... a friends blog i read earlier was asking as Christians how can we act like Christians in this culture without losing our salt and blending into the back ground... could blogging be part of our actions? typing what God is doing/done and will do is a witness of the heart... something no one can deni!

x