A good Christmas reflection...

http://www.myspace.com/iamyourhomeboy

Well its Christmas, and I figured I would take a little time off from celebrating my birthday to write a short blog about the holidays. Today's topic is the fat jolly man that people have come to love so much. I wanted to clarify something for the world, good ole Saint Nick and Myself are actually good friends. I have nothing against him, but I do have some issues with the culture that surrounds him this time of year. It seems that people would rather believe in Santa than Me. Just think of all the so called "Christmas" movies made every year. They are mostly filled with this misleading notion that everyone needs to have a little faith in Santa. For some reason they try to perpetuate this myth of Santa to the children. Now I know its just so the kids could have a little fun, but in truth it is damaging to My celebration. Not even Saint Nick would appreciate what has been done with him during the Christmas season. He has been made into a Christmas god. It's funny how people have always wanted to worship anything except the real God. Take a look at the Hebrews right after they were freed from slavery, it didn't take them long to create an inferior golden calf to worship, and today we have done the same thing with Santa. Americans have created an inferior Christmas god, to worship yearly. Its not that Santa represents bad morals and ideas, its just that he is not a good icon for what Christmas should really be about. Think about the songs people sing when it comes to Santa:
"Making a list, Checking it twice
Gonna find out who's naughty or nice"
Since when does being naughty or nice have anything to do with Christmas? If you really look at what my birth is about, you see that the gift of my life doesn't just belong to the people that have been nice all year round, its for the people that have been naughty as well, and really its for them more than anyone else. See I came for the loss, the broken, the hurt… The Naughty; yet we teach our children a very non-Christmas idea. We try to teach them that Christmas is about what you can earn by doing good, but if we perpetuate this lie we are really doing a great disservice to Christmas. My birth was about receiving a gift that you could never earn, no matter how naughty or nice one is. This is the trouble with Santa, he brings an inferior idea of what Christmas should really be about, My Grace. So this Christmas I pray you all will remember the grace I brought to this world several Christmas's ago.
Love JC
P.S. Yes I know that December 25th was most likely not the actual day I was born. The church changed the date of many Christian events to help the process of evangelism to many pagan cultures. The church tried to replace those pagan holidays with Christian ones, and in many ways it worked. People can argue about whether this is a good thing or not, but does it really matter? I am primarily concerned with people being made aware of Me and My story, and if that means that our traditions are simply the product of Christians adapting my story to the pagan culture than so be it.

Well its done!

Happy Christmas to all who read this rather late Christmas edition blog!

i have tried to keep the computer use to a minimum over the Christmas time or i will just lose any type of life i have left!

Christmas was different again this year... i think i will try to keep my own tradition of keeping it different each year... i dont want to fall asleep each year, bowing down to yearly tradition and forgetting what i am really celebrating... the birth of Jesus who came to become the saviour.

So em had my company for Christmas day, well from Christmas eve infact... and we had a quiet one... we did... nothing! which for a couple of youth workers was a difficult task to, when you areon the go somuch its hard to just stop... but maybe thats a disipline we need to bring into our lives more than just once a year.... (thats a whole blog itself)

Well.... the nothing consisted of opening presents... Church... eating... cooking what we ate... looking at what we didnt eat... forcing what we didnt eat to be eaten... TV... music... games... and face packs at 1130pm

a great day all in all!

em read the blog from 'Jesus' from myspace... i will paste it into the next blog... (tis good!)

but i do wonder if i should go back to the myspace land... i just dont know if i care enough to do it... but i do like the chance of more attension from yet another web pages with me on it...

x

LISTENING TO- Lily Alen LDN

things change...

I have become to think about my friendships over the past few weeks...

I love all my friends, and value their input in my life.
But howcome the balance sometimes just isnt right?
I have many different groups of friends, i seem to have different worlds with different sets of friends...

The hardest thing is the fact that these groups of people have nothing to do with each other apart from me. I know that the different groups have grown up from different times in my life, different settings and the fact is the people i love are very different at times.

But what happens when i seem to be losing my oldest friends?

I know things change, we all grow up and move on, but what about the casualties of the heart we have as we continue to walk down these paths?
Then things fizzle out and nothing more is said... how can you talk anymore? Am i scared of what i will hear? 'I don't think we are as close as we were'... if i know this what can i do about it?

When you break up with a guy you make it final.. or it will just get worse until you do...
But what about friendships? If we grow out of a relationship when does it end? Please dont get me wrong, i dont want to finish any friendship i have... but when things change what do we do?

How do we move on without bitterness?

Maybe i am thinking too much again

x

LISTENING TO- radio one waffling (still)

Well i didnt do that badly....

So my last post was to plug my seeling of MUSE tickets on ebay...
Which i have sold!
But i didnt make any money!
Sad but true... i broke even... so i have managed to buy MUSE tickets for myself... but no Cheaper than normal price...
Never mind... its the game we play!
X

LISTENING TO- radio one waffle talking

it is ebay time again...

hello to all my wonderful readers... all few of you!
I have to tell the world to bid on ebay once again... this time to fund my MUSE habit...
I am selling 2 seated tickets to see the wonderful band in wembley next summer... it looks like it will be a fabulous gig... so hit the link and bid.. or at least watch...
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/2-Muse-seated-tickets-Sunday17-06-07-Wembley_W0QQitemZ110069346449QQihZ001QQcategoryZ16067QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
Unfortunitly i havent gotten the skills for knowing how to make it a nice lovely one word link yet so we just have to look and click on the blah blah blah of this unsightly link!
x

LISTENING TO- nothing i got too excited about sellling something muse related!

Healing...

Its funny, healing can come at times when you dont think it will happen...

This blog might not make sense in places... but i will try!

I have had quite a distrutive love life which i havent really gotten over. I know and understand healing can take time, when things cut deep in our lives you cant expect it to heal over and stop hurting straight away.

But waiting can be just as painful...

It has been well over 2 years since things were messed up and finished with, but my heart still pangs and yelps when i am dragged back in my memories daily.

But this week things have gotten a little lighter, for now it seems i have begun, but stay focused on the fact this healing comes from God and no one else is hard.

I had an email from someone this week which has allowed me to move on and see things in a different light. My feelings have changed, but finding what to do with these new and changed feelings is difficult!

I cry cos i am angry,

i stop feeling so angry

and i cry cos it has been replaced with love of some factor...

its never simple

oh hug me now Lord!

x

LISTENING TO- start guitar by the chemical brothers

Illness is crappy...

So the reason for the lateness of these blogs is cos i have been ill... and i mean snotty ill.

I have had a nasty cold which has meant my head is like the M25 and blocked up at every possible moment, snot city.

Not to gross you out... but i feel i like to share these things for time to time... i mean write about it for you to read not 'here is some snot for you' sharing.

At least i didnt take a picture eh?!

x

the start of Christmas...

Well Christmas celebrations had to start somewhere this year, and college was the place to hit it off... and it turned out to be a mixed and varied evening!

The first thing i have realise is just how close to come to death of a day to day basis, the amount of times i nearly died due to lack of air at the Christmas shin-dig from laughing is crazy! Em and i can offically make each other laugh! In fact we had a whole evening to entertain ourselves it seemed! As you can see from this picture our company for the meal was er.... just us! It would seem that to be fashionibly late to a college Christmas meal means you get to sit on your own table! Now i might break out into a rant at the this point but i will try my best, i know that there were people who wanted us to move tables (with everything still on it!) and others who wanted us to join different tables... but we got a lil arsey and wanted to brood by ourselves towards the end!

But really we had a great time, apart from the nearly killing ourselves from laughing too much. We were given various cracker toys... well actually thats not true, by being the only two people on a table meant for eight we had a futher six crackers to bang, after we were 'kind' and let sarah nab a few extra for her table we decided to pull open the rest for ourselves. After nearly giving myself chest pain from hitting myself each time when pulling the cracker.... here are the fruits of our labour.... I think we did well!

But the entertainment did keep us happy for while... just as if we had been sat on the kids table we acted up... I think we found an excellent use of em's new tunnel!

I think that one of the table highlights has to be when we tried to see how many things we could hold while being in a photo and looking happy... oh and take the picture ourselves!

All in all it was a good evening, and as em has writen in her blog, we did have a few in yates to the go to the same night club we always seem to end up at in Bristol.... and i have to agree... please please can we go somewhere new next time? While i do like my bands etc it would be good to get a varied musical diet when we journey out!

Gotta say this next pic is an all right picture of us... but i have really posted it for the funny people behind us.... they spent most of the night snoging... while they come up for air this is their faces must has stuck like....

Well i could stick around and post many many more pictures of our adventures... but i will leave that for another day...

x

LISTENING TO-everyday i love you less and less by the Kaiser Chiefs

My tears maybe warm but they still sting

So i have the eternal question of... why is it when things seem to be getting to you yet another thing comes along to stick the boot in?!
i spoke with a friend yesterday about the annoying fact of life that us girlies do in fact like the male attension we, at times, get and when its not happening we want more of it than ever. We both realised (or at least i think we both did) that its more annoying that we have this reliance on blokes and their attension to us than the fact we arent getting any attension.
Why is it that once you have experienced something its so SO difficult to to not want more?!
It makes you think life as a nun from the age of 16 was a good plan, one of which is just too late for me and would now lead to a life of resentment!
It add issue to this problem, i had an email from someone in my pass, who should remain in my pass... (it is a messing area, which has never really been cleaned up!) and its been messing with my head all evening! And again it bugs me that fact it bugs me, not the fact i had the email.
Why is moving on so hard?
I know the bible answer...
I know what God is saying to me....
Yet my heart wont listen...
x
LISTENING TO-nothing, i am too busy stomping about

Lets try a deeper thought....

So have finished work... and ii am trying to stop my head from spliting in two... my head hurts, my usual migrain has come to visit me... i hate it not just because it hurts every time i blink, but because i get so ratty with everyone, i just want to hide in a dark room and sulk till i am better...

which is what i will do once i have done all my jobs here in the office...

I just wanted to bring something to ponder on before i go to bed......

(silently)

night!

x

well hello!

Grr at this silly silly blogging set up, everytme i write the title i hit the enter button thinking i will just get a new line... but everytime sure enough i get to save a draft of nothing... great one!

Anyways now i have gotten over this i will write today's blog!

I have been doing nothing much today, and i do really need to make sure i have everything set for youth work tonight but i wanted to up load the pics from Basement Jaxx before i did anything else... well the pics that are ok before the grumpy man came along to rain on my day...

Im not sure who the support was... but you can just about make out the best drum kit ever.... metalic PINK!

does this look like a picture i could get money for hmmm?!!

still its a memory!

you gotta have the kilts man!!
let me hear you jump and shout!! woop woop!

There are a few more but that will do!

i might return laters

x

LISTENING TO- Snow parol, The finish line

not sure...

i am feeling reflective at the moment... mainly due to the fact i am alone and so time to think is the only thing to do...
The Jaxx were great last night... tho i did get my camera taken off me from the stupid bouncer bloke half way through own fave tune 'hey you'... which meant half the song was taken up with fighting with the bloke saying i wont take anymore pictures to then being taken out to put it in an office to be 'looked after'... so as a result i dont have any good pictures to so off... the thing that really bugged me is the fact that when i picked up the camera at the end of the night the other guy who had been looking after it had said he didnt know why the bloke had told me it wasnt ok as it wasnt a professional camera! GRRRR.... it seems i really could have taken pictures if the silly silly man wasnt on an ego trip!!
Still the gig was good... and the drive wasnt bad either!!

So what else...
my head isnt in the right space to share... im off home to watch some crap on TV... ta ta
x
LISTENING TO- Radio one Zane Lowe evening show

money...

So this week i have continued my ebay obsession by selling things on it as well as buying...

money is very tight at the moment and so i have started to sell things!

Mind you i am only selling one thing... but i know it will sell so i cant lose... and it seems im not!

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/sex-in-the-city-DVD-box-set-ALL-6-seasons_W0QQitemZ110061417642QQihZ001QQcategoryZ41587QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

It is my sex in the city box set... i only brought it about a week ago... but i want to watch them all and then sell them... i just want to know what happens in the end (DO NOT TELL ME! OR I WILL BEAT YOU WITH YOUR OWN ARMS!) and then i dont think i should own them so i will make sell them and make lots of money! (mawh har har har!)

OH and i have one hour until i am off the plymouth to see BASEMENT JAXX!!!

So excited! Not about going to plymouth but to see the AMAZING jaxx will rock my world!

love muchly

x

i had a few moments

well good evening, or good morning, afternoon or indeed day depending on when you read this!

So i havent said anything here since last wed and i was feeling the need to blog...

altho i dont really have that much to say...

i cant breathe all that well due to snot... i have a cold and its annoying, there is nothing i can do about it... grrrr

still lets give you something better to read...

PLYMOUTH watch out!

I am off to see BASEMENT JAXX on tuesday evening!!!

SO looking forward to it... the Jaxx are AMAZING!!!

Hopefully i will have some pictures to dazzle you with later in the week!

right i am getting tired and i need to wake up before i go to work!!

X

LISTENING TO- fat boy slim- That old pair of jeans

please note bellow...

ok so in my avoidance in doing work i need to be doing i have managed to work out how to put a funky game and a clock onto my blog page... now i feel the need to tell you all... (its at the bottom\/)

job done... dont need to say anything else...

cant go...

that would mean work...

x

LISTENING TO- KT Tunstall- Black Horse and a Cherry Tree

Back from the weekend

So its blog time again, I’ve been away for the weekend at the youth conference in Eastbourne… didn’t really get much chance to see the town, in fact even less than last year because I didn’t skive off any of the seminars… I did the full weekend.

But my real annoyance is the fact I missed Rob Bell, well most of him anyway, is an awesome blessed guy whose passion for God oozes as he speaks, its infectious and it turns out he was speaking to the early day youth workers (the full time ones who aren’t attending a college course which means they are able to get there for a day earlier!) So I have the CDs of Rob speaking… which is not the same but its all I can do about that!
But really over all the weekend was good, I got to catch up with a wonderful lady and a great friend Cat, God really does bless me even in her presents. We spoke about many thing, and worked through some of the rubbish that’s is whizzing about my head and by Saturday night I was able to clear and start again.
I haven’t been able to get over certain things lately, I kind of hinted at it about a week ago, and it took a 7 hour trip to the south coast with a good friend to see what God is doing… and its good, frustrating… but good.
Now I need to not even wait… but move on.
Live in the Lord my saviour… simple really(!)
Each day is a new, and I don’t need to let the day before hold on, I am safe already.

On another note I am stressing a little, dead lines are fast on the horizon and I am bored of even thinking about what to do, I know what I need to do…. Just need to do it, and I really don’t want to!

Ok must dash… need to do SOMETHING at least!
X
LISTENING TO- Crazy by Lucid

i heart muse

Ok i want this to be last blog i write for a while about the wonderful band muse... i think i am annoying some people (em) with my love for music which really does speak to my soul, i know people (em) are pretending to not like muse and get annoyed with me... but the pretending is stopping me from expressing myself and so i have decided i will back off and keep this blessing to myself!

im not huffy really, its fine! no really!

So the gig was amazing, words can not really express just how good it was, Holly and i were tring to work out which was the better gig this arena one or the one in london in the summer, and there is no comparison, two totally different gigs, both equally OUT STANDING!

The real highlight was invincble... how it should be the new anthem for the Church today... then there was the amazing blend and mix into supermassive black hole from invincble... i could rave on and on but just take it as cool, amazing, great!

X

LISTENING TO- Chris Moore in leactures (which are very good!)

only one thing to say....

MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE MUSE!

TONIGHT!! so excited, so need to work on the old essays... but it so not going to happen... i just have to hope and well pray at college tomorrow we get time off in the afternoon and my nice and lovely college friends dont tempt me with doing something more exciting than writing an essay.

But for now... MUSE!! i am a very fortunite lady, MUSE and basement jaxx in the same month oh the wowness...

right i need to do some prep for CU this lunch time

x

LISTENING TO- the Kooks- Ooo la ;)

at ems...

so i have finally made it to emma's house well flat to have a no doubt interesting evening and while we are being sad and looking at our laptops (the closest we are getting to college work is farting around on the internet, well not farting farting, that would be impossible without a mic, but you know what i mean!)
and i have come to ponder just how much i value my friends, tonight was going to be another night of free take away with my parents cos i thought everyone was busy... and em steps into the gap and now we are planning a top night of fun and frolics... i get to see holly and matt at probably the best gig of the week next tuesday which will be amazingly blessed...

after talking with em this evening i have realised just how much i try to reason and barter with God, i am really resentful about somethings that have happened in my life, and i want to wash over them in my own way, but i know that God wants me to place ALL of it in his hands and to give him the trust... but i cant no matter much i know and want to give him it all, how much i want to leave my past in the past and move on, i KNOW i can not solve my problems myself, it just wont work, God isnt even allowing me to try my own way cos i would dig myself an even bigger hole! i have so many mixed feelings about this God is awsome, he is my father who looks after me more than i know... yet i am in a huff cos i cant get it my way :)
well better go and show em just how you make proper links on a blog page
x
LISTENING TO- MUSE- supermassive black hole (not the whole song cos em got pissed off at it)

so i need to work

so with college and all that there comes dead lines and essays etc, however no matter how much i WANT to start early and in fact i am very nearly getting close to enjoying the reading lark... i still have no sense of urgency about it all... i do not want to leave it to the last minitue like i normally do... that is part of my learning style, however i do not really want to do that, i havent the time or energy to run my college work like that, however i am sat writing a blog, thinking about it would be good to do anything but what i need to do, ebay has never looked so good!

I dont really have the money to be sucked in the ebayland at the moment either!

i annoys me too the fact i have no idea if my grades and marks would be better if i didnt leave it to the last min to complete the essay.... but i do need to start getting realistic... WORK FIONA NOW!!

right... i do need to go... for any other reason than i have nothing else to say here...

but i think i will find a nice pic before i post!

x

LISTENING TO- radio one rubbish (i love radio one but every now again away they really do play some rubbish... 'smack that'... hmm nice(!))

count down...

ok this is hopefully one of only a few MUSE related posts...

BUT ONLY ONE WEEK TO GO!!!

come on holz and matt woop woop!!

x

LISTENING TO- shoot the runner- kasibian

i would like to say...

this lady is wonderful and amazing...

the one on the left that is...

x

LISTENING TO- wires by athelte

howdy... this working lark is all right!

well as the title says... working isnt that bad!

when i say working i mean writing something for my college fieldwork stuff... its a little late, but yesterday i had a revelation on how i should be writing how i need to write my essay thing.. hooray!

So i have very little money at the moment... but my love and passion had to be kept, at last the BBC's radio finally made the Live Lounge CD... and i bought it today, its amazing, love hearing tallent and these CDs are 40 tracks of it!

Its funny the other day a friend from college challenged me to ask if MUSE were my god...

I have to say... Muse are not my god, God is my Muse... (see what i did there?!)

Revelation in anything, i believe we can find a glimpes of God if we seek him, and music is my place... smile

x

LISTENING TO-The streets. Lets puch things forward (live)

Ok i am really just copying em... she used our picture in her blog... but i do love this pic and it was an amazing holiday... she puts it much better than me!
I just hope our next holiday more people can come!!
I am really just trying to entertain myself, i am sat in college and i am getting very sleepy... due to not the most stimulating leacture happening.... its a good subject, just not exciting!
x
LISTENING TO-nothing but i wish i was maybe somthing by kasabein

In shock...

Well well...
this is a turn up for the books... holly and i have started our work on this terms essays!!!
yes is that a WOW i hear?! I know something special eh?!
no really its great to crack on with it all, i have SOOOO much work to do it s crazy... thus the making of a new blog http//djtink-at-youtube.blogspot.com and putting this blog online...
i am really enjoying the work this year... God does work mircles! but it is SOO much but i will keep plodding on like i do!!
starting to get annoyed at the office now... not excitiing for me... maybe i need a vending machine?!

x
LISTENING TO- MUSE apocalypse please
TRYING TO- write something intelligent

last night i was annoyed

So i got a little annoyed last night, wrote a long blog and then the site crashed and it was lost into the nothingness of laptop land...

after i have just tried to re-write what i think i wanted to say i have decided to delete it... no it is no more!

(just realised just how many 'e's are in the word delete has!)

So what is my thought for this evening?

I have some thoughts on youtube... but i want to think some more before i unleash them!

ok... does the desire to be loved make the world go round?

love is about trust, acceptance, doing anything for the other person... without these things why are we here?

We are made to be relational beings... made to love... but can we really understand what that means and what the effects are?

Sacrifice is the ultimate action of love, and yet most of your earthly thinking is on bargaining.. what is it worth... if i do this what do i get or what happens to me if... conditional love is a dangerous thing to have and yet its a human (sinful human) thing to have, the game we play.

Like it or not, many people believe Jesus did the sacrifice which beats all others hands down... he died so we might live, i know this... i know it in my head and i know in my heart, but only at a glimpse do i know it in my heart... i still wonder why Jesus died for me, i feel worthless, not worth bargaining for let alone loving Unconditionally... yet he did... he made me in the first place!

There will be one day where i will be able to understand more, i will be restored into the human being we were meant to be at the start, the human without sin... perfect and without fault... i cant wait for that day to come... the end of depression, i can hardly believe could happen... but it will!!!!!!

x

LISTENING TO- Kasabian- Shoot the runner

ok so im not sure if this is a good thing...

so i have joined youtube...........
is this a good thing?!

hmmmm

we will see!!

x

LISTENING TO- MUSE take a bow

Ok so i didnt meantion it the other day but i went to see delirious? on thursday evening in newport... and it was a great gig, i love my music me! While i dont have much musical taste when it comes to Christian music... i cant seem to find a band or person i really love, deliriou? dont do too badly on the scale...

they really seemed to enjoy performing which is a presure in itself to watch... but the element which is missing in all the other live gigs i go to is the worship part, the fact that all the singing and clapping, whopping and dancing is for God. While i strut my funky stuff for God on a daily basis, it was great to be in a place were everyone was doing to same...

Church is meant to have the element to it isnt it? all coming together to praise to our creator? i want and desire to have the all embraceing feeling i get at a gig at church... but then am i wanting it for selfish reasons... 'i' want the hype 'i' want to feel excited...

Can the 'boring' church life at times remind us how God is in the everyday and not just at the high points and low?

dont we need it all?
and what about the people who donthave it at all?

how i want to share this passion... and i am!!

x

LISTENING TO- dont give up... Basement Jaxx

why did this make me cry?!

i cry a lot... im a girl and its my right i guess, i seem to have little control over it lately!

but i can only see the beauty in this video, Christ's love is IN the action not the words...

beautiful... it truely is

x

LISTENING TO- the video track

(thanks to piet and richard passmore for their blogs)

So here is my new start... out with the old and in with the kind of new... my myspace will be closed from next weekend and so i have decided to make a go of this blogging lark...

It might be that i waffle about nothing, or i do in fact make some great discovery, either way nothing no really lose apart from the time it takes for me to think and type. But its a start of something i might continue!

i have decided i will put more pictures with my blogs, either to show my mood or something i have seen of late... also i get to show off my loving camera then!

i am a lil unsure just how truthful i should be here, in my blogs i mean, do i tell all or to i doctor it? It might become a depressing rant, which i wouldnt wish on anyone, but then if im not being honest, expressing how i feel what is my aim?!

So with that my first proper blog of the state of mind grows... what IS the aim of my blogging?

I want to invite anyone and everyone to stop and think...
I think its part of my calling by God to provide spaces for people to think about their faith and spirituality, to find a real sense of what they mean, think, do and how they see things and what that means to them and the people around them...

We all influence the people we are around... this is just another way of do that right?

So i hope my rabble on here will provide space for people to think... what would i do if that was me? why would i do that?

maybe this will become a diary...

who knows lol

x

LISTENING TO- relight my fire by take that

Why is blogging important?

So anyone who has wondered over my pages over the past few months we realise i havent been blogging of late...
and i have to ask why i still have a site...
why do i will i should have one? is there a need? is it just a good practice to have? talking to anyone who is willing to read and maybe comment... or is it having the accountability to write your thoughts and hope you can establish something meaningful sometimes...

Why do we blog and what did we have before this?

penpals? are blogs impersonal letters with less responsiblity?

I dont have the answers... i dont know if we can every get them... i dont know if i reallly care... but i still have a small resonsilbily to keep this open, to keep writing... to keep waiting... a friends blog i read earlier was asking as Christians how can we act like Christians in this culture without losing our salt and blending into the back ground... could blogging be part of our actions? typing what God is doing/done and will do is a witness of the heart... something no one can deni!

x

God in all He creates

I am continually asking why certain things are important to me, looking at the value of these and seeing if the ranking order i place them in my life is right.

Music is a HUGE place in my life, i cant play anything other than a CD, i can only press play on the computer, or que at the doors to listen live to others play. But i feel its deep than i know or understand.

As you know, or have read, i saw MUSE recently in london, and until that day i have never been able to put into words what music does to me. And from that i can only basically frame something to work on.

Music for me reaches my soul and makes my heart pump faster, this isnt the trill of the bass alone, but i am starting to see, or feel, this is as God. The Holy Spirit does indeed move in mysterious ways! For me to be faced with a beautiful song, tune or melody is seeing a new glimpse of God.

How do i explain this?! I believe we are created in the image of God, we, although still sinful, have elements which are given by God. These skills are represent God, these gifts show me how God IS here and NOW!

How can i ever say God is not real, i meet with him daily, in a guitar solo, in a voice crying out in song, the beat of the bass vibrating.

This is something i wish everyone can know, knowing the very alive God. For he does indeed smile on us.

x

not sure what i will say...

so i have noticed i havent really said much on here lately, mostly been in awe of MUSE.

still am really, just a truely beautiful album.

Still on the MUSE line... their 6th track 'invincible'...
This track just plain and simply gives me the vision of the church.
The song lyics are
'there is no one like you in the universe' (God?),
'dont be afaid of what you think stand up for what you believe for tonight we are invincible', 'please use this chance to say what we truely know', what ever they say your soul is unbreakable',
'tearing the struggle, they will pull us down, but please please lets use this chance to turn this around, for tonight we can say together we are invincible'

This is just a quick listen and type job, but the message it simple.

While it might have been writen for a couple, a partnership but i can only hear how a group of people who with the power of the holy spirit can stand united under God. Something which can never be broken. It has been the sunday school aniversary this past weekend at my church, the theme had been living in harmony, this is indeed a difficult place to be. Harmony is something we can not really grasb as sinful natured humans, selfishness is our centre. But within our churches we can start to build up each other to be in harmony with each other, helping one another to see the good and help the wrong be righted for the true to continually set us free. For this to then spead into our communities and the world!

The Church needs to stand united in God, in the harmony He can bring, for my tonight we say we are truely invincible!

x

The Muse gig...

Well what can i say?!

MUSE are indeed AMAZING, both Holly and I can not find the words to express just how cool it was to be the first to hear live some of the new tracks from their new and fabulous ablum!

The whole day was something spiritual, God has blessed me with a chance to meet him in music, to deepen a wonderful friendship and to feel at peace, only He can do that in the busy city of london!

Matt's voice from MUSE was as beautiful as ever, haunting but comforting, stunning yet cool. I have never seen anyone else who can out perform MUSE live, and i dont think i ever will.

Even if you do not like rock music, you must still find a place in your heart for the shear skill those boys have in their musical tallent and understanding of how music can be made.

I can not wait till i see them again... and i will be spending my next £9.97 getting their new ablum on monday you should too!

x

I am SO excited!

ready or not london....
here i come!

MUSE!

Oh my goodness, its going to be SO good

I am such a lucky girl!

Come on Holly lets start running!

x

Why can't i/we share?!

Ok... so how DO you get your 'feelings' out there....?!
How do you tell someone you like them?
How do you tell someone the truth?

Why are we all so scared of what might come back?
Rejection?

Is it a girly thing to read too much into a situation or it that something everyone does?
And then what do you do with they thinking?
What if you are right?
What if you have looked in and got it correct?
But what if you are wrong?
What did 'that' converation mean?!

How do you know?! ]
How are you sure?

Why are matters of the heart not straight forward?
Shouldn't we be able to just jump out there and wait to be caught?!

Why are things SO complicated?!
I am sure it could be made easier....
Kids do it.... 'my friend fancys you!'

Should we do this too?!
But then that leave us open, the sticky mess of feelings being shown, making people feel icky.

thanks for the rant...
x

Only 16 different templates?

“Quick, ingenious, good and many things. Stimulating company, alert, outspoken. May argue for fun on either side of a question. Resourceful in solving new and challenging problems, but may neglect routine assignments. Apt to turn to one new interest after another. Skilful in finding logical reasons for what they want.”

This is who I am according to the test we did at college, and I have to say I am pretty please, it seems to have me in a good light! And is in fact quite close to who I am… however… it has faced me with a little problem, its like the horoscopes, this test has 16 different categories, does that mean there is only 16 different types of people? Likewise with the horoscopes, are there only 12 different people in the world according to that?

I don’t have the aim of rubbishing anything, but I find it hard to believe people can really be generally defined in such a few words, ok I recognise there are a few more ways of breaking it down further, more complex ways of defining a person. But aren’t we not who we are, the one and only, shouldn’t we all fight to be ourselves, celebrate our diversity. Smile at the differences?

I find it hard to understand that our maker made us from 12/16 basic templates.

Hmmm…

x

Where does the spoon come from?

We are talking about where we get our theology from at college at the moment, and its flagged up just how much we can be spoon fed what we think and what we think we know and understand.

Isnt it he challenge to the find and seek what what WE and I and what YOU think for ourselves... why do you agree with something why do you disagree with something? Where has that come from? Have you worked it out for yourself or have you been spoon fed from someone else?

Its seems to be important to question to ask... who are you and what do you think? no really what do YOU think??

x

my picture so i can put it on the blog!

hmmm this isnt working yet...

i am annoyed at my lack of effort in this blog so far, but i have been a very busy girl college work is piled very high!
Also i have no real idea how i work this silly blog site!
where do i put the info about me?
how do i put my picture on it?!

oh well... thinking about inclusiveness in college at the moment, it is a challenge to all, Christian or nor Christian... just how inclusive are we?

responding to the world changing in God...
what is God changing at the moment... if the church isnt meeting the need now... where are we going?

Jesus leads the revolution!

x

Lets start again?!

Ok so i have tried to work on this site before, but i forgot everything about it, and then was taken on by the myspace crowd. However, now i have been reminded of the wonder of properly blogging, (cheers Piet) i will indever to start again!

And so i will try to come on and write when i can, and it would be great to have input from others.

A little bit about me... A am training to be a Christian Youth Worker, and nearly finished my first year, two more to go... hmmm i will have to get back to you as the battery on my laptop is about to die!!

x